Autumn Equinox 2016

via we heart it

What is an Equinox? 

An Equinox occurs twice a year, in September and March, when the tilt of the Earth’s axis and Earth’s orbit around the sun combine in such a way that the axis is inclined neither away from nor toward the sun.

via we heart it

Earth’s two hemispheres are receiving the sun’s rays about equally around equinox-time. The sun is overhead at noon as seen from the equator. Night and day are approximately equal in length.

 

Important things to note: 

• Today, Mercury is out of Retrograde! (We made it!)

• Until December's Winter Solstice, the days will get shorter, with the Solstice typically being the shortest day of the year.

• "Equinox" is derived from the Latin "equi", meaning equal, and "nox", meaning night. This implies an equal amount of daylight and nighttime, however, that will not actually happen until September 25, 2016.

• This morning of the Equinox, the Sun enters Libra - the sign of equal scales

This is a time of balance. 

It has been a Spring and Summer of tumult, pressure, and/or simply too many overlapping plans and crossed wires. The high energies of Leo in late July and August creates a charged atmosphere that tends to be unsustainable. Now we are shifting to Libra, sweet, calming, Libra. 

In simpler terms - now we get to catch our breath. We can de-cluttering our space, set sanity-saving intentions for holidays, make our homes more cozy, and connect to the real moments of this season. 

via Elysian Life Design

It is NOT a rush to New Years Resolutions and sometimes I get caught up in that. I can't wait to plan for the BEST YEAR EVER. I get so caught up in how to celebrate my way while also honoring family and cultural traditions. I want to listen to Emo music and get reeeeaaaalllyy nostalgic - while that isn't usually the best route to peace and finding joy. All of these things are okay - but there needs to be balance. 

I will let go and acknowledge impermance. I will appreciate nature and act with integrity. I will savor the time before snow rather than living in fear of what winter will bring. I spend too much time outside of the moments and I'm really looking forward to this fall so that I can be conscious of my choices and take part in this season. 

Rituals for the Equinox

Connect with the harvest (apple picking, baking pies, carving pumpkins, creating that perfect fall tablescape). Interact with nature (string leaves for your hearth, go for a hike, have a bonfire or an autumn-y 'one last barbeque, instagram that leaf!). Set mantras, intentions, or prayers for the soul focus you want for your season. Light candles, burn sage, do a tarot spread with your housemates (my preferred celebratory ritual).

From pumpkin spice lattes to crystal grids and door blessings - find the way you connect with autumn the best, bring awareness and gratitude to it, and indulge in it.

via Over app

THINGS TO DO IN DC for the Equinox:

• DC Veg Fest

• Pathways Natural Living Expo

• IMCW Meditation offerings

• Full weekend Yoga Retreat

• Saturday Fall Equinox Yoga Workshop & Luncheon

REFERENCES

• EarthSky.org

• TreeHugger.com

FURTHER READING:

• The Spiritual Meaning Of The Autumn Equinox

• Mystic Mamma Sept. 22, 2016 Equinox

• Mystic Mamma Equinox Activating Balance

• Elysian Life Design Autumn Equinox

Response: Happier Podcast, Lucky Charms

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My strange good luck charm is my PHONE WALLPAPER.

When I'm im in need of an emotional shift or support - I'll change my phone background around to suit where my head is at.

If I choose one that lasts a long time or through something significant -- the galaxy print that traveled with me through Europe; the Danielle LaPorte mantra "Vitality is your natural state" that pulled me through a difficult fall/winter; and currently a pop-art pic of Baddie Winkle helping gain personal momentum -- I notice it takes on stronger meaning. 

I begin to associate these wallpapers with whatever energy I'm moving through or toward. Currently pop-art Baddie Winkle is reminding me to stay true to myself and be bold in my creative energies - she is proof that that works - and that's definitely good luck. 

I don't know if you can imbue something to be lucky or not - but noticing the association is key. For instance, in trying to be intentional - I thought a retro bin to collect change in my room stating "the art of making money plenty" was the perfect lucky charm for my wealth corner but it didn't work. I wanted it to cultivate something but it didn't. I am still many pence none-the-richer. So try, try again.

Noticing things that are already working seems to help more than forcing luck or energy shifts to happen. 

I love the 'lucky charm' concept and I'll definitely keep my eyes peeled for more. All the best to my fellow Happier listeners. x/Amy

Life After 30 (high altitude, single origin, 1800m above sea level only)

The above subtitle is one I read about espresso - in a pay-for-content, blog-famous personality's 2016 Almanac. It made me laugh. It put some ideas in perspective - I've been mulling over the differences between those in their twenties and we in our thirties. This description illustrates what I've discovered astutely.  

People seem to move from the self-righteous flailing of youth toward revelatory living with conviction - they're not dissimilar but are packaged very differently.

TWENTIES

From what I gather, it's largely the same from when I was there - now with Snapchat! A lot of brazen attitude. There's the not giving any fucks, road trips, music, and drugs and/or the audacity to believe they're going to disrupt all of the things. It's the two sides of young responsibility - "Me? Fuck no, never! I'd rather be buried in my debt than give in to the man." or "It's well within my 5-year plan to be worth over a million and I'm currently a Creative Director of something that may or may not exist after those 5 years but who cares because money." 

THIRTIES

Common thoughts here: "Wait. No, seriously, wait - all that was bullshit? Now I actually have to figure out what I really want my life to be about? Ooooookay. How do you expect me to do that?" There's the calm relief from the removal of the imagined pressure of your twenties. But then comes the renewal of the concept that this is our one life and we better make it count. Enter in loads of guidance:

• HOW TO BE PRODUCTIVE
• 10 MORNING RITUALS HAPPY PEOPLE STICK TO
• SUPER FOODS
• 7 MINUTE WORKOUTS BETWEEN SOULCYCLE CLASSES
• FUCK THAT CORPORATE LADDER - I'M AN ENTREPRENEUR! 
• ALL THE COACHING AND BOUTIQUE LEARNING
• MEDITATION
• DON'T LOOK AT ALL THAT - I'M STILL SO COOL (so cool I have an excessively specific, pretentious espresso standard)

This is not a critique. I'm claiming what I'm seeing - how our needs change between these two decades. As I said, however, it's not SO different. 

Similarities include: perpetually getting "healthy", being better about money, binging on Netflix, congratulating oneself for "adulting", and procrastinating. 

I enjoy being in my thirties. However, the calm that happens, the resigning of myself to the truth that figuring it all out never happens and reclaiming seeing the beauty in the journey - I can't claim that. I didn't cause or create that, fortunately that seems to happen naturally. What I do claim is that - 

I have some beliefs that will not wane as I move forward toward forty. Here they are, in a nutshell:

WHAT I'M OKAY WITH:

I'm totally cool with (and grateful for) "I'm hungover," never being a reason for anything ever again. Seeing a progression in how I spend my time, and what my social time is centered around is cool - it's the point - what would a life on only 1 mode be? These 20 year-olds who crave adventure, excitement, etc. will hopefully be able to see that the definition of that isn't confined to one filtered tumblr image of a road trip. I experience more with the expanded eyes and interests where I am now than when my Saturday-night-checklist was short and stupid.

WHAT I'M NOT OKAY WITH:

(and will continually try to work against, here are some posts around my work on fear)

This one is terrifyingly real and we have to put in work to fight against it. I combat it with surprise dates, saying yes to things I'm uncertain about, trying new things, travel, moving myself more toward curiosity and interest and away from obligation, and working on staying in the present. Personally, I have always been the chart on the right, but I believe there's hope. Just don't be blindsided youngins, stay woke.

WHAT'S TOTAL BULLSHIT:

• DRESSING YOUR AGE - get the fuck out of here with that, absolutely not. 
• Mandated MILESTONES - marriage, kids, savings accounts, a practical job, they're ALL OPTIONAL, remember that.
• Concepts like - own, rent, new, used, vintage,  branding, marketing, quick fixes, people never change, money as a solution, fitting in - always find ways to stay true to yourself.
• BEING UNAWARE, it's never too early to care about your health or learn to manage your money

WHAT'S TOTALLY ACCURATE

...and that's okay. When I'm home in NJ I hang out with my 23-year-old brother and his friends and I have fun for a couple hours and then I go home to my reasonable bedtime or prayer life or tarot reading and it's all good. I respect their need to explore the world explosively, I strive to do so in new ways also. I also really appreciate how comfortable I feel, the support I have, the pockets of stability where I can wander off and explore the world, rearranging my bedroom, and continuing to grow my life - openly and not within the confines of either decades' made-up structures. 

x/Amy

SUFFERING

All suffering is the same.

- This is a loaded concept, but one I was advised to accept for my own sanity. Everyone suffers at one time or another - it's not a matter of why or how - it's a matter of regard that its happening and practicing compassion.

The goal is to perceive suffering as 'on/off' rather than a scalable condition. 

Outrageous, I know. People in third-world countries unquestionably suffer more than I do, right? While I believe that to be true, that has little IRL, real-world application. I practice gratitude to account for the privilege I was born into. I practice this common-suffering concept to account for  all my judgement-of-others I also was born into. 

Facebook is a breeding ground for arguments about right and wrong but a base level of understanding and empathy would really do everyone a ton of good. Everything at it's core is either fear or love and if we left it at that we could all go about our business without all the hatemongering that the internet and IRL culture fosters. 

Humans are tribal by nature and many can only typically have empathy within the limit of what they've experience within that tribe.

This is why Republicans needed to have family members come out as gay for them to open their mind to any sort of 'love is love' point of view. Many humans can not have empathy for concepts that don't actually touch their lives.  "People are suffering because their love is prohibited," should be enough. It doesn't matter where or how their suffering falls on your personal spectrum. 

An individualized spectrum of suffering doesn't count for shit. Turning off my quantifying and qualifying of others' suffering has given me unimaginable amounts of peace and a much larger capability for kindness.  Turn on your IFTT recipe for 'If Suffering Then Compassion'.

Make striving   for peace bigger than your judgment.

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All the love. x/Amy

COMPARE

Comparison is an Ego disease.

Comparison is an ego disease. 

My posting about style is about as amateur as it gets, I'm aware. There are women my age (and younger!) running fashion magazines, labels, brands, million-hit-blogs and I'm touting the virtues of hand-me-downs. Luckily, that's not the point - but my brain insists on it being a factor. 

Last night, I went to a hookah bar with Mickey and Anthony (both 22). Their 5:30pm shots of tequila allowed for a rather exploratory scope of conversation. I saw my brother and his friend in a different light - as struggling young adults, uncomfortable in their growing pains - it is a tough summer. Most of his friends, including Anthony, graduated while Mick's staying on to do another year for his graduate degree. Everyone's working and moving away from friends and girlfriends - wondering if and how these relationships will last. Mickey has a new apartment and internship, multiple jobs within the University, and is starting to formulate potential start-up ideas. Michael Daniel Ladines is doing the damn thing. It's impressive to watch. It's familiar, however, to see him this weekend - on an impromptu road-trip to see far-away friends, recounting high school missed opportunities while tipsy with his sorely missed best friend.  Doing the damn thing is doing Mickey's head in with ALL THE CHANGE. Every fluid reflection was a validation of his or their choices, soaked with insecurity. Everyone is scrambling in their early 20s. 

Settling into my 30s, I've slowed down a bit. I'm taking a minute to look around. This gives me the freedom to play older, wiser (in my own head) while I eat chicken and salad and they opt for beer instead of food.  Mickey remarked that Mom could not stop talking about me, how happy and proud of me she is. While she's always been positive about my growth, this struck me  as odd - I haven't done anything. Aside from the past year of intense self-care resulting in significant weight loss and a healthy romantic relationship, nothing's changed. Is that worthy of the beaming pride I can actually feel over the phone from my mother?

IS SUCCESS BETTER QUANTIFIED BY HOW YOU MEET YOUR PERSONAL AND EMOTIONAL NEEDS IN ANY GIVEN CIRCUMSTANCE THAN BY HITTING ARBITRARY SOCIETAL MILESTONES? 

The definition of success doesn't have to be so rigid. I mean - Maureen just got MARRIED - exceptionally well, I might add - no detail of that warm, expansive party was overlooked. Sarah P. and Rachel both GRADUATED (in hella tough, impressive subjects). Kate and Pam moved back to the States after 5 or so years LIVING ABROAD and extensive traveling (I'm definitely about that life). Sarah H. and Hafsah each HAVE 3 KIDS (who are absurdly cute and I sometimes claim as my own)! Alongside that, there are the timelines and accomplishments of celebrities and 'locally famous' people to marvel at. I could get really caught up in WHY AREN'T I DOING THOSE THINGS? But... NAH. In this moment everything is okay. Somewhere, somehow, I've stopped comparing. I've stopped adhering to a rigidly defined definition of success. 

We live in a culture that enforces instant gratification and a strict set of circumstances to define success and happiness. Success, satisfaction, and happiness are not in an object (bottle, ensemble, or paycheck). Those things are achieved by your reactions to life - how you respond to what's directly in front of you. So, I've stopped comparing. It's a weapon. 

I've raised my awareness of how damaging comparison-living is. I consciously move away from it. I move toward participating in the moment and being good to myself, honoring what feels good (like documenting my outfits and using it as both a self-actualization tool and a fun blog component). Other things: 

• Take the facebook app off your phone (you can still access the site from your web browser but I find myself checking it WAY less). 
• Unplug -put the phone down- when in an actual IRL social setting.  
• Have conversations and observe that others are doing this same constant self-evaluation in their own head. 
• Accept yourself - you're exactly where you're supposed to be - taking teeny-tiny or even large steps to whatever makes you happy.

These little adjustments in behavior and perception have helped me see what a success simply being alive and grateful for it really is. Removing comparison and imagined expectations gives me freedom - the freedom you might not feel from under that cap and gown and the weight of the world of opportunities on your shoulders.

"Don't let perfection be the enemy of the good." (Voltaire) and 'what's good' is subjective and within yourself not quantifiable by comparison. 

x/Amy

Further Reading: Being busy does not equal being productive and 9 other Fundamental Success Truths We Forget Too Easily  (via Forbes)